I was a young girl when I had a vision of all the people who my life would touch. I tucked it away in my heart. But no matter where I went I was reminded that Im just a little different.
I ran in my heart from that vision for so long (while serving God on a church pew) because I did not think that I would ever be able to do that. I learned recently its not about me anyways. It was God. He didnt even need me to accomplish his plan. For some reason, he just chose me.
When I was a suicidal girl struggling with a life that I did not want (bc I got no satisfaction outside of his will) , I would close my eyes and see a glimpse of the millions of people I would touch. I honestly didnt want to be her. I didnt think any man would want me if I was too powerful. I wanted to get to a secure place in life before I surrendered to the life plan I knew I would one day have to say yes to. So I got busy trying to secure my own future telling God when I got settled down, he could finally use me.
I lost everything that I surrendered to that was not Gods best for me. I was brought low with the only option being to submit fully to who I already knew I was.
Something started happening earlier this year. When I am at the altar, I see those same people, as if I am already standing in front of that crowd touching lives yet when I open my eyes I am still Charity. Its like I have carried them in this soft and gentle heart all these years. As if Ive said, hang on Im coming to you. I received a prophecy about you when I was really young. Yes, I ran from you. But if you would just hang on just a little while longer, I am running to get you. I see that Yes, I can do this. Where I was once so insecure, now I can stand in front of you and say –its not about me. Its about the one who holds my world and my whole heart in his hands.
I know that I didn’t choose you for so long. I know that I didn’t want you. I wanted to be anything but the one that would stand in front of you with that mic and let you know that the same God that chased me down my entire life is inside of me waiting to let you know that just like he delivered me that tonight right now your deliverance Is here and you will serve God your whole life just like me.
So don’t leave from your post. I am coming to you.
And I know that at just the right time, I will be boarding the plane that leads me straight to your heart and we can finally hug each other and cry tears of joy that Gods plan won and satans hold on my life couldn’t make it no matter how much he tried to remind me that I could not do what I was supposed to do.
No matter who tells me that I shoud not and can not do this, I will confidently say you are right I can not. But Jesus can.
I don’t exactly know when, I feel like its soon but what does this little girl know.
She don’t know nothin’. Shes just a girl full of dreams given to her by her almighty Father.
So please, Lord. Let this wait end and let me finally be where you showed me all along that I would one day be.
